| Wow, I haven't posted here since December? How nice of me. Now I need a new layout and everything. I mean, don't get me wrong, I love Sailor Moon, but eh. So much has been going on lately, it's making my head spin. I need a good head-spinning, though. In fact, so much has been going on that I think that my fingers would fall off before I concluded. In no order of importance (because prioritizing past events is lame), and with no further adue, I present to you: CHAOS! Brian moved back about 3 weeks ago, but the thing is he's gone again. Long story short, A certain roommate that was supposedly his friend committed a crime against true friendship; his life went downhill after about a week of being here because of her. Thank God he had his parents to fall back on back in South Dakota. He says he's going to save up more money at ShopKo, Rapid City, and then move back to attend college at Viterbo. Hopefully this becomes a reality, because I really do miss him and his quirky homosexual self. Have you ever had a crush that made you smile whenever you laid your eyes upon them? Well, I have. For a long time, I thought "he seems like a really nice guy, but...pssh it will never happen," and yet... it did. And guess what, I was right--he is a really nice guy. He's caring, considerate, kind, and we have so much in common (and still our differences). I really should stop gushing, because it's not like me at all. I'm still not used to being so...revealed, vulnerable, and willing to open myself. I'm so used to my indepenence, and still am quite, but I know I want to let him in. Even a month into our relationship, it's still so strange to look at him and realize "oh, yeah...we're together." It's quite nice, though. Very, very nice (fantastic, elating, superb). <3 Although, I am having my little paranoid qualms about my leaving for college. What if he loses interest in me? Will my absence make him want me more? Will we grow apart? I know we both have the strength to be apart, but will it keep us together? I know that the campus is only an hour and a half or less away, but I am hoping that we will get to see each other at least twice a month. Should I even be worrying about this stuff? Is it normal? I sure hope so. I wonder if he has the same worries. College. A time to grow, to discover ones own potential and make new friends in a fresh, unfamiliar environment. Going into your first semester, your stomach may be drenched in all sorts of emotions: fear, excitement, uncertainty, happiness, sadness. With eyes wide, one should be determined to learn all that they can and involve themselves in all sorts of people, clubs, and activities. I am determined to join at least one club, make friends outside of my "group," and accept any challenges that may befall my path. I am more excited than anything to live on my own (in a way), eat when I want, wash my clothing when I want, excercise at least three times a week, and blast my music without my mom going "you're going to hurt your ears." I know i'm hurting them, but hey. That leads me to my next subject: my family. My parents have been strange lately, but I think that's only because they're not used to me being so social, so occupied. I really do appreciate all that they're doing for me, and all this freedom that they're giving me, but I think that they are being just a little paranoid (as am I). I refuse to let them think I am going out and creating some kind of situation for myself that I won't be able to pull myself out of. That has never, ever happened...and it probably never will. I love them, though. More than anything. Well, time to go spend some time with them. More later. I need to start updating this thing. |
